Here Are Joe’s ‘Secret Audio Bribery Tapes’ You’ve Been Dying to Hear

Good morning Krusier fans!

Whereas I believe in a person’s privacy and would prefer to say nothing, I feel I owe you a bit of an explanation as to why Kruiser is out today and has given me the pleasure and privilege of stepping in to write the Morning Briefing.

I will say no more than this; Kruiser is alive and well. As a dad to a wonderful child, he has decided to celebrate Father’s Day the same way many men do: with beer. He will return tomorrow, and I suspect he will have a story for you about drinking IPAs in the Sonoran Desert and shooting off a new gun at commie cacti.

I want to start by saying Happy Juneteenth to every American! I ask you all to hoist your coffee cups and cheer the day Republicans took away the Democrats’ slaves. They’ve been cranky ever since. And if your blue-haired, trans-pansexual harpie-in-law ever screeches, “But the two parties switched sides,” show her this brief Prager U video that proves she — and her theory — are nothing more than embarrassing flapdoodle. They can’t change history:

FACT-O-RAMA! If you believe the Democrats said, “We are tired of being racists” at the same time the Republicans said, “We want to start being really racist” and the two parties “switched sides,” I’d like to sell you my invisible, one-eyed Unicon named “Cyclops” who will remind you every day that you’re a gullible idiot who shouldn’t be allowed to vote or reproduce.

Bye-bye Bidens

The Bidens are done.

I know, I know, we have reasonable suspicion to believe the Biden crime family will never be held accountable for the treasonous bribes Joe has accepted and passed through to his family of Delaware trash, but remember this:

That is where the Bidens are now. We all know they took mad stacks to make decisions for Burisma — and God knows who else — but the cat is out of the bag. Too many people know the truth. Will the swamp-dwelling lizard people risk losing their pensions to protect him? Not for much longer.

The FBI now has a choice: step aside or go down with him.

Remember when we heard there are 15 tapes of Hunter Biden and two of Joe discussing bribes? You can hear (what at least are allegedly) Joe’s tapes below (hat tip to OAN and Dan Bongino):

Mark my words; Joe Biden will not run in 2024 because too many people are waking up to his crimes. Even the Communist News Network (CNN) has begun discussing it.

Watch when reporters ask Biden about the bribes. Normally he doesn’t respond to questions he doesn’t like. But when it comes to his bribes he can’t shut up. Gropey Joe’s mocking laughter can’t hide the truth. He foolishly — and vomitously — spews out painful answers, from “I’m an honest man” to “Why don’t you stop asking dumb questions?”

To paraphrase the Guess Who, “He didn’t know what he was headed for, and when he found what he was headed for, It was too late. He’s come undun.”

The Biden family is a pile of buttered toast, and Joe knows it.

As a 34-year veteran of standup comedy, I have learned a few skills, one of which is the ability to judge reactions. I believe Biden’s arrogance is fleeting. He is scared. I see it in his dead, kiddie-groping eyes. He is beginning to panic, and his excuses smell worse than Lizzo’s yoga mat.

Biden isn’t afraid of jail. He fears something which — to him — is much worse. He knows he and his family will go down as the most corrupt presidential clan in American history unless the globalists win, in which case nothing will be written about it and I will end up in a gulag fighting rats for moldy cabbage.

FACT-O-RAMA! You can tell Gropey Joe is lying when he follows up a fib with stabilizers like “That’s true” or “I’m being serious.” But you know he has gone full-Pinocchio when he says “You have my word, as a Biden.”

Trans Am……NOT!

Did you see the Democrats are using trans people — instead of black folks — as their pawns lately?

We just witnesses a classic commie move with the Dems and the Los Angeles Dodgers:

Well played, you clever apparatchiks!

They managed to make a bunch of unknown dudettes who make money with a hateful, anti-Catholic drag “act” into victims of Christian bigotry, even though they actively attack Catholic beliefs.

WHAT THE FACT-O-RAMA! When he isn’t in jail, Sam Brinton — Biden’s former luggage-swiping transamabob from the nuclear energy department — is one of those “brave” drag nuns.

If I got five guys together to mock the trannies, we would be labeled “domestic extremists” and put on yet another watch list. But men in drag gyrating on a large cross is somehow a show of “bravery.”

OPINION-O-RAMA! Attacking Christians is easy and acceptable. If the drag nuns had an ounce of courage, they would mock Muslims, who actually kill gay people. The LGBTFBI crew are gutless cowards. They know if they went after Islam, they might get their heads cut off. Christians — being roughly 300 years ahead of Islam — don’t riot when we are berated. Also, the globalists know that Christianity — and the 2nd Amendement — stand between them and world domination. This is why Christians and guns are the bad guys, not Muslims.

Pause for a cause

What kind of capitalist piglet would I be if I didn’t take a moment to tell you I have a daily radio show, cleverly named The Kevin Downey, Jr. Show, which can be heard worldwide at every Monday-Friday from 10-11 am Eastern.

I hope the bold lettering helps you remember to listen.

TRIGGER WARNING: If you like funny, anti-communist radio shows, this is for you. We say things on my show that attract strong minds and offend weak ones! So please tell your beta-cuck liberal friends all about it as well. If I get enough death threats, I might be able to get one of those fancy, nationwide concealed-carry permits!

It’s Monday, so let’s start the week out with a laugh.

Check out this short video from my friends at “Jokes and a Point.” They have a library full of funny content. Mocking the leftists is how we win!

Watch this and let me know in the comments what you think: is Joe Biden a feeble-minded muppet, or is he pretending to be one so he doesn’t go to jail?

via pjmedia

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